Carson 4 months old

I LOVE these smiles. It's amazing how goofy I am willing to act to get one of these!

This is Carson at his 4 month check up, just loving the sanitary paper they lay on the exam bench!

On Being Relevant

My generation is sort of interesting. Well, I bet all generations were interesting when they were in their 20's.

The 90's yielded a lot of Christian cliches which are now mocked by us who are or used to call themselves Christians. We've grappled with postmodernism, homosexuality and the emerging church. We were in our teens when the year 2000 came and when 9/11 happened. There's also been a huge upsurge in evangelicalism and it's grappling with culture, between separating from and engaging in it. My generation is a few years out of college and ready to save the world.

All that to say... what's the same about my generation as with those previous is this: we all think we have something new and fresh to offer. We purposely want to reject what the previous generation did because it is old, harmful, restrictive, and irrelevant.

It's a lie that my generation has something new and fresh to offer. What's trendy or in style always changes, and those who are trendy like to mock those who aren't. What's theologically "traditional" and "new" has never changed in substance. If you study church history the same debates we have as Christians now they had then. There is always someone ready to deny what "has been" taught in church and there is always someone to fight against it. And then there's everyone else talking about it. It dies down, and several hundred years later it crops up in a different form with a different name.

It's a lie that my generation has something new and fresh to offer because,

"What has been is what will be,

and what has been done is what will be done,

and there is nothing new under the sun" (Ecc. 1:9).

Now that I have a son to raise, my perspective on my generation has changed. All day I care for, nourish and clean my son (babies have a lot of bodily fluids, I find). He is totally dependent on me. I don't have much time to sit around and navel gaze about what's the right way to "engage" in culture as a Christian. The time and money to buy the latest fashions is not available in large amounts...

When I read the Bible I find constant reminders of God's immutability. God never changes, and man does. While culture vacillates between new and old, right and left, stupid and stupider, God is still God.

As a mother I have to cling to God, not a culture or way of life. If my focus is on denying what my parents taught me, what good does that teach my son? If my focus is "not this, not that", what will the vacuum be filled with? I will teach my son my "Yes".

It truly is a waste of time to focus on denying and rejecting things. Cynicism is not the answer to the mistakes of the previous generation. I think maturity as a Christian is being able to move on from that and cling to God. That's what I'll strive for as a mother.

exciting/sad

Since Carson is napping and I have chicken on the stove, I thought it would be a good moment to think of the pros and cons of our moving across the River in May. But instead of it being a pro/con list it's an exciting/sad list.

Exciting:

-much more space

-our own yard/garden

-living by church friends

-living very close to Aldi

-owning a home

-room for more kids

-settling down for at least 9 yrs

-my work as homemaker expanding!

Sad:

-moving further away from my friends in Louisville

-leaving behind our first apartment

-being totally unfamiliar with our surroundings

-settling far away from our families for a while

-having to go up/down stairs hundreds of times a day (this should be on the exciting list, shouldn't it?)

-not living next door to other moms with infants

-making new friends will happen less

-we will be stuck there rain or shine

packing

change

I don't like change anymore. In college and high school I loved going new places and being busy all the time. But since marriage I love being settled down, doing a routine and having a place for everything and everything in its place. I even watch the same movies and TV shows over and over rather than watch new ones.

Don't get me wrong, new things are great and fun. But I need to truly learn how to cope with change. I am still in shock that we are not only moving to Jeff, but settling there for several years. I am also in shock that we're leaving this apartment complex where I have some good friends. We're leaving the apartment we have always known since becoming husband and wife. It's just a little weird.

I thank God for this new blessing, but I have found that when God blesses it's more than just ease and comfort. It's usually responsibility and a little hardship mixed in. So in order to handle my fears of things going wrong through this big change, I tend to plan waaay ahead by already starting packing, planning how I will do yard work and what we need for it, being super duper diligent with all of our documentation for the loan...

Ok, so I just wrote that for the purpose of records. We'll see how things go in hindsight, and then we will all see that change isn't all that bad.

pictures of the new home

We have a pretty big yard to mow! And a large basement which we have dubbed the awesome possum fun room. (That's how we talk in our family, yes it's weird!)

The upstairs living room and the large kitchen are below! It's triple the size of the kitchen I've been cooking in for four years. I'm hoping some good cookin' is gonna come from it!

the house

We have been looking at houses for a while, but never expected that April 1st we would've put an offer on a house and have it accepted! It went crazy fast, but was in God's good timing. If you're curious how, well here it is.

Rewind several weeks and you would find David and I butting heads over what to do about buying a house. He was interested in fixer-uppers, I was not so much. I felt unloved, he felt disrespected. We were talking past each other, but by God's grace and prayer we resolved our communication by me being more open to whatever house we could find and David promising me that he won't leave me and Carson in a dirty or unsafe house while he is at work.

Once we resolved our issues, we began touring several kinds of houses we found on David's phone app. This only gets you so far, and since David is unable during most business hours to make phone calls and set up appointments, I helped out by searching for different realtors. That's how we found Bart.

Bart had very high ratings and awesome reviews by a couple dozen buyers and sellers. It helps to have a Realtor looking out for your interests and providing you with knowledge and opportunities that zillow can't. So Bart showed us a couple houses on Saturday March 31. It was much easier to look at a house with a Realtor looking at it too. He pointed out things we didn't notice, gave us estimates on repairs. The first house that day was big but needed lots of repair. The second house was smaller and move-in ready, but was in a less safe area. By the end of the afternoon Carson was tired and hungry and I was nursing him in the car.

As David and I sat there in the car I turned to him and said, "Why don't we just save up for another year or six months and come back to it? We could get approved for a higher loan and find a house in a safer area." David agreed, but still wanted to look around. Bart drove away but had left us with the address of another house he himself was selling.

This house is in Jeff, where we weren't looking so much because of David's commute. Someone had already put an offer on it. But we thought "what the heck, let's just drive by it".

Turns out this house is by some dear friends of ours (the first people I knew in the Ville). It was priced to sell quickly (84,900!) and had only been on the market 14 days. It is a 3 bed 2 bath house with a finished basement, large yard, appliances included and move-in ready. It was lived in by a widow who took great care of it.

Bart had told David that we could look at the house because technically it was still on the market. The people who had made the offer were given a counter offer at list price (they were nuts to offer lower than the already low list price) and they had not accepted it yet. So we set up an appointment to see it.

We went there right after church. By this point David had been in serious communication with a loan officer and with Bart over us qualifying for down payment assistance, loans, etc. That's what made the deal for us. Because we are relatively poor, our low annual income allowed us to receive money from the state of Indiana for a down payment (there's a catch with this, more later). This opened the door to consider the house.

When we toured it I was amazed. I loved it. All the other houses we had looked at didn't sit well in my gut. A few of them gave me the heeby-jeebies. But this house was well-kept up, just with outdated but clean and functional appliances, paint, carpet, etc.

So David, Bart and I were left standing in the living room. Both guys were looking at me. David with an excited and crazed look in his eye, Bart looking between us. They were waiting for me to say "Let's do it" (I had joined them later after nursing in the car). I didn't want to have to be the one to make the call, so I looked back at them, smiling. I love awkward moments.

So I thought about it during that awkward moment, with Carson fussing in the background, the cinnamon candle glowing on the end table, and all the lights on and doors open for show. Hmm... There were no red flags. The house was perfectly within our pre-approved loan amount. It is close by several families we know and love and in a good neighborhood. It had more than we had wanted in a house. We had the means to do it.

So I said we should do it. Then another long awkward moment as Bart sat down at the table to get our the papers. David and I remained standing, a little shocked at the whole thing, asking Bart more questions to make sure we weren't just signing ourselves up for something we really couldn't afford. Bart is an honest and straightforward guy and had so far told us the truth about things in previous houses even if it hurt the possibility of him making the sale.

Finally the three of us sat down at the table and signed the dozens of papers required to make an offer. We made an offer for 3,000 above the list price to increase our chances of being accepted.

As we walked back to our car after signing the papers, a lady came walking down the street looking at us. By the look on her face we could tell she was the seller. We introduced ourselves, made small talk and told her how nice her house was. She went into her house to meet with Bart about our offer.

Less than an hour later we received the call that our offer had been accepted. BAM.

Closing is and possession in May.

So let me tell you how the details fell into place. One is our lease. It is up June 1, so our last rent payment is May 1. Our first mortgage payment isn't until July1. Second, the mortgage payment is less than our rent, but utilities are more, and if we estimate correctly, this will be no increase in our monthly budget, except for the occasional repairs that all homes require. Third, our insurance payments will remain the same even when adding homeowners insurance because the rates are so much lower in Jeff. Fourth, I felt the need to save our paycheck stubs, all of which we needed for the loan application. Five, we happened to sell our car, stereo, and save a few extra dollars here and there without knowing that purchasing a home was coming so soon, yet having more than enough to pay for the things required before closing. Six, we happened to find the right agent at the right time. Seven, despite David's hunt for ministry jobs around the country, we never felt led to them or had any open doors, while at the same time feeling a calling and love for our wonderful church in New Albany. We want to see the kids in our church grow up if we can. Eight, we didn't have the money to buy new appliances, and now we have perfectly good outdated ones to use! We also don't care that the carpet in Carson's room is pink, or that there are tulips painted on the walls in our room (no offense to tulip lovers!!).

I could go on and on, but you get the picture. God is good, and he must be providing this house for His glory. I pray that he gives us opportunities for hospitality and love for our neighbors.